Project Finish Line: The Definition of Success

Welcome back, friends and few readers I have remaining! I am a neglectful blogger as of late, but rest assured this is the one time you’ll hear the words “It’s not you, it’s me” and have them be 100% fact.

My life, like yours, is very full at the moment. Full of challenge and tragedy, fear and frustation, new friends, great joy, travel adventures, new pursuits, old habits, a bit of wine, and lots and lots of coffee. I have no idea what the purpose of all this beautiful madness is, but I keep doing it and am learning to have fun with it where I can. 

First let me share some joy (coupled with frustration!): I am a size 8 (at Express; F those other designers). In six months I lost 20 pounds (and put 5 back on), 2 sizes, and gained health, strength, a teeny tiny bit of speed, a dash of motivation, and the ability to simultaneously breathe and run. 

My book is in it’s final editing stages, and my finances are still a nightmare. Ha! But the beat goes on, and I consider my accomplishments, though requiring of consistent and ongoing dedication and effort, a success. It’s all about the continuation of the process, the journey. Keeping taking those steps forward, and you will continue to meet small victories. Or at least maintain those you’ve achieved. As an overachiever and perfectioniast of sorts, it’s often difficult for me to truly celebrate my succcess, because until recently i’ve measured success only in terms of that which can truly be metricized (not a word, but should’t it be??) – what can be counted, compared, weighed, etc. 

But then I went to Saint Louis at the end of February and sat in my Harvard National Preparedness Leadership Institute training session and was introduced to a different and, I think, much more healthy definition of success. 

The doctor facilitating the session asked us all how we would define success in our own words. Across the room I and some of my colleagues immediately went to career, income, accomplishments. Others cited family, love, the successes of their children. And why wouldn’tw we? We have people who depend on us, adventures to take, and bills to pay. Success is ensuring all of those things can happen without straining resources too much yes?

Perhaps. 

Or perhaps not.

The doctor relayed the greatest definition he’d every heard from one of his class participants, and I’ve stolen it and am sharing it here today. If I knew the man’s name, I would happily credit him with his genius. Alas, I do not, so if you’re out there and reading this, kind sir, my hat is off to you and I welcome you to leave a comment and claim your (limited on this blog) fame. 

I’m going to share this exceptional peace of wisdom with you now. No, no – don’t dive right in. Stop for a moment to prepare yourselves to have your mind utterly and irrevocably blown. Stretch a bit, take a few deep breaths, get a glass of water if you like. I’ll waith. This is important. 

Okay. Are you ready? Here it comes. 

The definition of success is that no matter where you are going, you can’t wait to get there. 

Did you get that? Simple, right? 

And yet how profound. 

Think for a moment about the last three places (phsyical or not) that you’ve been today. Work? Home? Grocery store? On a date? To the gym? To a movie?

Were you excited to go to those places? Why or why not? If you were, great! I’m so happy for you! 

But if not – IF NOT – then why did you go there? Well, groceries are required to live. Fair enough. But did you buy wonderful, healthy food to make a fantastic and cost effective meal? Did you engage your kiddos in cooking with your, or did you revel in exporing necessary culinary arts on your own like a closeted Emergil Legasse? Did you say “BAM!!” when you added a dash of spice or a pinch of flavor? Did you  laugh at your own ridiculousness or listen to music you loved while you did it? Did you use a recipe or a kitchen tool handed down by a relative or call up your mom/dad/grandma/best friend to ask about their recipe or reminisce about the time you did the thing at that place while you at the one dish?

Or what about your job? Do you spring out of bed in the morning and rush to get to work because you were excited about soe project or person? To be honest, I don’t springs anwhere before 10:00 AM and at least 16 ounces of coffee, so no worries if not.  But did you at least not have to pull yourself out of bed by your own hair before getting to work and sitting in the parking lot breathing just to force yourself to walk in the door? Come on – we’ve ALL had THAT job. And perhaps there’s just no getting out of it because of adult responsibilities and obligations – I get that. I get that in the most painful way. Are you doing anything to make it better? Do you at least enjoy the peolpe you work with? Hell, do you even get off a little on pushing your boss’s buttons if nothing else? I love my boss, and even I enjoy getting him gassed up – just cuz I can. 😉

What about home? Do you love, love, love your single life? Thre freedom and independence to do what you want to do when and how you want to do it? Or are you jazzed to go home to your family?  

Do you love to work out or read or watch movies or do brunch and happy hour, or even just walk the neighborhood?

I know for many of us these little luxuries are just that – luxuries. And how do you get excited by a life that you feel you’ve somehow just ended up oin? How can you feel jazzed to go to a job you hate to pay bills you can barely afford (or can’t afford at all??) to support a family you can’t stand? Letls be honest – some of us have those. So how is succes achieved, by thie definition here, when you hate your life and feel trapped in it?

Well that is the million dollar question,isn’t it?

Here’s what I’ve come up with: small changes over time. And consistency. 

I’m NOT an expert, and I have no advice. I’m just as fucked up as the next guy. In fact, proabably more so. I can only tell you what I’m doing to acheive this measure of success. Figure out what I want, focus on it, and make small, manageable changes consistently over time. 

Earth shattering? Probably not. But I’m open to suggestions.

 

Next time we’ll lighten it up a bit and go DIY. I have three completed projects I need to post, so stay tuned…

Project Finish Line: Has it Really Been a MONTH???

The last time I had ten seconds to myself that weren’t occupied by some other pursuit was two weeks ago, and I haven’t posted at all in regards to Project Finish line since January! Yikes!

So, let’s get caught up, kids. 

 

Goal 1: Size 8/145 pounds

Business travel gave me one helluva setback. I went from 149 (so close!!!) all the way back up to 153. Amazing how taking it off requires Herculean efforts, and putting it just requires a box-to-mouth Donut Curl. It’s entirely unfair. Fortunately, one week back home eating somewhat more intelligently and hitting the gym a few times has me at 151.2. I’ll take it. And I’ll try to remember the progress loss the next time I feel like a cookie might be an okay breakfast. 

Thank all good things in the universe for Chris Powell and his carb cycling! Seriously people, if you haven’t checked it out by now, nothing is working for you, and you’re like me an need immediate results to stay motivated, you must try Carb Cycling! Please at least just read about it here. You’ll thank me. I promise. 

 

Goal 2: Write a book

Done. Well….sort of. I wrote it. I’ve made some changes on screen, and as I said previously I have no printed all 212 pages and am slowly setting to the task of some hardcore editing. Alas, I have no red pen – or green, as was the favorite of my journalism teacher in high school – but I’ve gotten through a whopping three pages, so blue must be acceptable. 

I’m wondering if there’s anyone anywhere who would be willing to do a seondary edit of it. After a while you have read something so many times, you stop seeing the mistakes. But there was an excellent piece I found online about editing by writing your books four times. Check it out!

 

Goal 3: Pay off debt 

This has proven to be quite a bit more difficult than I’d hoped. Following the drama of emergency dog abominal surgery, a broken car, and some unexpected medical expenses, it’s going to take well over a year to get where we need to be. BUT – we completely paid of a dishwasher, and are now very close to doing the same with a small amount of student loans (under $500), and then we move to the big time: CREDIT CARDS. Two of them. Totaling more thousands of dollars than I’m willing to admit. Under twenty but over ten, and it makes me exceedingly uncomfortable. 

 

But on to more fun things! 

 

I have nearly a week of solo time (hubz is out in Miami DJing during the annual Winter Music Conference – so proud!) over which I’ve also taken some PTO. The goals of Project Finish line will, of course, be a focus, but so will some long-time-coming DIYs I’ve been dying to finish! Check it out: 

DIY 1 – A reading nook, or what I’m also calling my Cone of Silence. The idea being that, when in the cone, leave me alone. 😉 I’ve been inspired by these coupld of pics on line:

     

This chair will be the foundation of said nook: 

I have vaulted ceiling, so I’m imagining translucent curtains with white Christmas lights, and perhaps some kind of additional color and shine involved. Stay tuned…

 

DIY 2 – Seriously, my wine rack. It’s time to get it done. Two years in the making almost. Ugh. DOING THIS! 

Lots of Pinspiration of this project out there, and I have all the wood, stain, tools, etc. Just need to get my @$$ in gear. 

 

DIY 3 – A wine bottle light fixture for the dining room. The only thing lacking here is some electrical wire, fire proof wire coverings, and bulbs. Oh, and my spouse’s faith that I can install it without A) killing myself, B) burning down the building, or C) both. It will be something like this, but with wine bottles instead of mason jars: 

 

I will get pics of each project step-by-step and share them here, along with the super easy, lazy-girl’s way I recovered my black, white, and purple chair shown above. 

I also may be painting the master bathroom blue and grey above some white bead board. We’ll see how motivated I get. I mean, at least ONE of my days off should really be a day OFF, right??? Is that how it works??

That is a TON of DIYing in five days. I may have to call in reinforcements!